Heart Broken Defective Out-Casts
by Ruby92
Summary: Dib hasnt seen Zim since his dad died, and entered hiskool. Both have changed greatly
1. A New Dib

Dib walked through the halls of Hi-Skool. He was a sophomore now, and things had gone from bad to worse since he got here. His father had died over a horrible chemical accident caused by a student he was mentoring, and Dib and Gaz were left alone two years ago. Gaz suddenly took interest in their father's work, and planned to take over the lab and TV show when she graduated. Dib was considered an out-cast, and most people forgot that he was a Membrane. He mostly lurked around the city, but his enthusiasm for Paranormal Investigating was over; died out when he was left alone, cut out from his family, and left with no friends. Not like he ever had any to begin with.

He sulked through the day, noting how colorless everything looked lately, when suddenly he saw a flash of green pass by. _Zim_? He barely saw the alien anymore. After awhile, Zim stopped his demand for world dominance, as did Dib in his demand to capture the green teenager. Zim had grown a lot taller over the years, but was still fairly shorter than him. He didn't see his old enemy again that day.

"What to do…." Dib searched idly through the files on his computer. A file marked "Alien_Filth_camera_00567: HOUSE" caught his attention. "What the fuck is this?" he muttered, clicking on it. Several camera feeds popped up. "Oh, shit…Zim's house." He decided to spy, remembering how much fun he used to have watching Zim. Now it all seemed so bitterly mocking to him. "Kitchen….living room….lab…no…where is the little fucker?" Dib finally saw him in a small, dimly lit bedroom-like place.

A round bed sat near the back wall, and he saw Zim curled up there. The door opened slowly, and the little robot walked in. "Master, are you okay?" Dib was surprised that the little idiotic contraption showed any emotion besides unnecessary joy. He finally noticed Zim completely. He was shirtless in black skinny jeans – something he must have recently taken a fond over – with tears swelling in his big, ruby eyes. "No, Gir, I'm not." His voice had gotten a bit deeper since Skool, and he seemed….hopeless. _What the hell happened to you, Zim?_ Dib thought.

"Why not?" Gir crawled into the bed with him, watching like a worried puppy. "You know why, Gir," Zim said the word slowly, like it pained him. "How I've been banished here…." Tears flowed freely down Zim's green skin, and Dib noticed that they were a dark gray. Gir curled up next to his master, letting himself be clutched to, like he had done this a lot. "How long ago was it, Master?" Zim paused. "Three years, Gir…" Dib didn't know what the two were talking about, but could assume it was bad.

Dib watched as Zim cried himself to sleep, the only comfort coming from cold metal, and found himself in tears as well. Dib's last thought before drifting into a depressed sleep was how he wanted to hold the ruby-eyed boy in his arms; to stop the tears. But he didn't know if it was because he felt it would help himself, or if he truly cared…

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	2. A Fight to Remember

A few weeks went by before he saw Zim again, but Dib wished they hadn't met the way they did. Dib had been rounding the corner to go home when he found a small group of boys standing in a circle. He wouldn't have paid any attention to the bullying if he hadn't recognized the voice begging for things to stop. "Ah shit, Zim!" He muttered, jogging over in his combat boots, his trench coat billowing out. He never really changed the way he dressed, his hair still spiking back in that off fashion, and a few piercings marking his ears. The only difference was a change in shirts, and now he preferred fitting black tees. His agility never changed either, thankfully. "Hey! Cut it out!"

The boys turned their attention from the green-skinned kid. "Aw, daddy's little reject come to preach about ghosts?" One boy mocked. "That joke would've worked when I was twelve, maybe, but at fifteen? Pathetic!" The boy took a swing at Dib, who deflected easily. Bullies didn't fuck with Dib Membrane for a reason; he knew how to fight.

Dib fought off the three or four boys easily, landing a few kicks to the sides with his steel-toed boots. After they realized they'd lose, the kids left with what little dignity they had left. Dib turned his attention to Zim. He was a crumpled green heap on the pavement, dressed in black skinny jeans, a black shirt, and his normal boots and PAK. His had traded in his cheap wig for a messy black one, but kept the contacts. Now he was spitting blood that was so dark red it was slightly purple. "Come on, Zim. Let's get you cleaned up." Zim could barely stand, but Dib easily lifted the alien and carried him to his house.

A few hours later, Zim finally woke up. Alarm rose up in his body when he realized he was on a lab table next to a counter covered in strange bottles. "Calm down, Zim. You're at my house, in my lab. I keep the first aid kit down here." Zim looked up into amber eyes. "You remember me, right?" the alien squinted as his vision cleared, taking in the familiar pale skinned gothic boy he used to hate so completely. "Hello, Dib-Filth," He muttered, but didn't really mean the insult. Dib watched his old rival sit up, clutching his head. "I'd offer you water, but…" He laughed, remembering Zim's fear of rain. "Ugh…shut up." Zim had a massive headache, and needed to get home.


	3. A Sleep Over

"No, you aren't going anywhere, Zim. You're badly hurt, and from what I can tell you still need to rest." Dib didn't fully understand the alien's anatomy, but at first glance Zim looked like shit. "No…Gir…" "-Is right over there, playing with my toaster, Zim. He rushed over when I told him you were hurt." Gir giggled happily as toast popped up, dressed in his dog costume. Zim looked grim. "He never smiles anymore, really. Not since…" his voice trailed off, but he lay back down on the steel bed. "You can sleep upstairs, dumbass." Dib laughed.

After a few minutes of arguing, Dib finally got Zim on the couch. "If you try to hurt me, I swear, you'll…" "I'll feel the wrath of ZIM!" Dib mocked, making fists and emphasizing Zim's name like the alien used to, and to Dib's surprise, Zim smiled, as hollow as it seemed. "Good to see The Dib remembers." He curled up on the couch, covering himself with a blanket. "Master! Slumber party time! I brought TOAST!" Gir bounced into Zim's lap, producing a few chewed on slices of burnt bread. "Yes, very good Gir. Now, rest with your toast." "Okay!" Zim smiled affectionately at the little robot as it switched to sleep mode. Dib always found Zim's accent interesting, but he had never heard the alien speak so sweetly to anyone before. He decided he preferred it to the yelling and strange rants he was used to.

Dib had started to walk away when he heard a soft voice behind him. "Dib?" he turned. "Why did you help Zim?" He shrugged, feeling nostalgic when Zim talked in third person. "Because, I don't know, you looked like you needed it." Zim looked puzzled, trying to find his words. "But…The Dib hates Zim." "That was so long ago, Zim. I'm different now." He paused. "Why do you call me 'The Dib'?" Zim's antennae twitched in confusion. Dib never asked that before. "Well…You are different from all other humans. Therefore, The Dib is not to be confused with any other meat-sack by said name." The pale boy was shocked by that answer. "Wow…I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not." Zim's antennae twitched some more. "Will Dib stay up with Zim tonight? I don't really sleep, and certainly not in the enemies house."


	4. A Long Night

They didn't have school tomorrow, so Dib agreed. In the end, they were talking about the other's species. "What are those antennae for, anyway?" Zim looked up at the low hanging ends. "They are equivalent to human ears, I think. But they also show emotions. They twitch when Zim is confused, or nervous, and bend back when I am angry or frightened." Dib looked at them oddly, wondering why he never noticed the twitching before. Then he realized he never got nervous when they were kids. He was too confident for that.

Zim had very odd questions. "What are those hard, dark buttons on your chest? I noticed that the male swim-team had them. I am confused." Dib laughed. "Those are nipples. They aren't anything, really, just sensitive spots." Zim tilted his head at the thought of that. "Do you have sensitive spots?" "Of course, Dib-let," Zim looked at his antennae. "These are sensitive. Rubbing them calms me down." Dib noticed the left one twitch a little. "That would've been fucking helpful when we were younger." "Fu-king? Zim is confused." Dib laughed.

"That's called cussing, Zim. Fuck, bitch, shit…all used when you're angry or frustrated or something. Like when you say 'curses'. Humans replace it with cuss words." Zim tested the feel of cussing for a few moments. "Fuck…hmm…Fuck!" Dib laughed. Seeing that green skinned alien cussing was just too funny. "What is funny to Dib?" "It's just that you're so clueless to the humans, yet you've been here for about four years. It's funny." "Wait, I have a question." Zim said after a minute. "Hmm?" "Males talk about fucking. What do they mean?"

Dib blushed. "Do they have mating on your planet?" "Of course," "That's what they mean. Instead of saying mating, they say they fucked a girl, or boy." Dib thought of something. "Hey, do they have gays on you're home planet?" "What is that?" "Two guys that mate?" Zim blushed. "It is not usually practiced. We tend not to mate for pleasure." "Why?" The alien shrugged. "All males are expected to be soldiers. No time for pleasure. Invaders need no one." "Well, don't you get…you know…lonely?" Zim pondered this. "Invaders need no one." He insisted. Dib sighed.

"Do males mate here?" "Yeah, but they aren't supposed to…Nobody here likes gay guys." "Do you not like gay males?" Dib blushed, deciding to admit himself to the alien looking calmly at him. "Honestly? I'm gay." Zim looked shocked. "Odd. I always took you for someone who enjoyed females. I do not know whom I would prefer. I have never mated before." Dib asked his next question without thinking, and wished he hadn't as soon as the words left his lips. "You ever jacked off?" Zim gave his old, familiar look of skepticism; one ruby eye large while the other was half shut. "What is The Dib asking Zim?"

Dib laughed nervously. "You probably don't even have an organ for sex on the outside of your body." "What? You mean my…oh what do you call it on earth….erection?" Dib nearly fell over laughing. The alien was angry at first, but when he was informed what an erection really is, Zim blushed in embarrassment. "Fine, then. What do you call it?" "Penis. Or cock. Or dick." "Why so many names for one object?" Dib shrugged. "Well, yes. I have that. But I don't even want to know what 'jacking off' is." Dib secretly wondered what the aliens dick looked like, blaming it on his old love for paranormals.

The two talked for another few hours, but Zim eventually fell asleep, hugging his robot close. Dib fell asleep after reaching his own bed, not bothering to change out of his clothes.


	5. A Few Broken Bones

"Bouncy! BOUN-CEH!" Dib awoke to the sound of a metallic giggle, as Gir jumped on his bed excitedly. "What the fuck!" suddenly Gir stopped short, staring at Dib with big, dumb blue lights. It was creepy, how quickly Gir's emotions changed. "Master is having a bad sleep-thought, so I came to bounce on this thing!" The robot gestured at Dibs bed. "What?" Dib didn't know what a sleep-thought was, so he went to the couch to investigate, leaving Gir to bounce around. Zim was shivering, and tossing around frantically. _Oh, a nightmare_. He thought, leaning over Zim.

"Zim! Wake up! You're having a bad dream!" Suddenly Zim shot up, eyes wide, but due to his injuries, he was hit with a sharp pain in his stomach, and Dib heard a crack. "AH!" he yelled, falling back down on the couch. "Shit, Zim. This is worse than I had thought. Come on, you have to get back downstairs." Dib carried the little alien, trying to hold him as still as possible.

When they got back to the lab, Dib realized he had no idea how to help Zim after giving him X-rays. "Hey, do you have a copy of your species anatomy or something? I don't know what I'm looking at on these images I took." Zim didn't seem to be listening, but a small cord shot out from his PAK and plugged into his computer, and Dib was asked for confirmation on the transfer of a file called "ANATOMY_IR:KENS_file:334522"

When he opened the program, it pulled up a full, in depth model of Zim's body structure, nerve system, and complete medical history. Not like that last part would help, but it would be useful for the alien doctors he must have gone to. "Okay…oh! So that works as your rib-cage, almost….Yeah, that's not supposed to be cracked like that….Shit, Zim. You've got 3 broken ribs, a tear right…umm, there, and a bruised shoulder. I'm going to have to make an incision in your lower abdomen to reset some of this stuff." Zim nodded, starting to regain some of his senses.

Gir wandered in then, suddenly looking very menacing when he saw Dib with a scalpel. "What is human doing to Master?" The normally blue eyes started going violet, and then to red. "Umm, helping?" A small growl formed in the little robots throat, and he jumped onto the table protectively. Zim stirred. "Gir, I'm fine. Stand down." Gir didn't listen at first. "Gir! Execute command as instructed! Stand down immediately!" The robots eyes dimmed to blue and he plopped down with his tongue sticking out. "Hey, metal-fuck, move your ass!" Zim glared with his big ruby eyes. "Don't speak to Gir like that, Dib-Filth!"

Dib rolled his eyes, and Zim looked down at his companion. "Gir, go play with your piggy," Gir pulled out a stuffed pig from his head and ran off making airplane noises. "Okay, can I give you any painkillers?" Zim shook his head. "I don't know what it will do to my body. Just cut in, I'll be fine." Dib reluctantly made an incision on his stomach, finding the oddly-shaped bones. He found the few that needed the reset, and pushed them back. "FUCK!" Zim screamed, sweating bullets. "I'm sorry, Zim, shit. It's over now." Before he could even give Zim stitches, the jade skin healed over itself.

After a few X-rays, Dib was satisfied with the resets. "Okay, you'll be sleeping in my bed so you can have the extra support. I'll take the couch, and hopefully your little dog won't bug the fuck out of me unless it's important." Zim smiled. "You're letting the enemy in your bed?" He made a clicking noise with his snake-tongue. Dib shrugged. "I already know the wrath of ZIM! How much worse could it get now that you're taller with skinny jeans? Plus you're really fucked up." The alien looked at his pants. "They help with running. But they get a little tight…" Dib laughed. "Come on, Zim-Scum."


	6. Slight Insight

Gir jumped in then, lifted his master, and marched around the room for no apparent reason. "Gir! Upstairs!" Zim commanded, trying to keep balance in the little robots arms. "Okay, Master!" He bolted upstairs and tossed Zim on Dib's bed. "The Dib's room has changed greatly. No more surveillance evidence of the Almighty Zim?" Dib chuckled at the alien's self-given title, and pulled out a box from under his bed. "All evidence is in here, thank you, with back up files on my computer. Never cared to get rid of them, I guess." Zim looked at the box with the words "Paranormal Activity/ZIM" scrawled onto it.

Dib left to go sleep on the couch, and Zim looked through the box of pictures. "I had such enthusiasm then…such power," he remembered sorrowfully. _So many pictures….My house, Gir, but mostly me. Look at how confident I was, then. I had such a purpose._ He thought, looking through all the pictures of him walking, head held high, or plotting world domination in class. "My entire life revolved around the Irken Armada. Now what do I have to live for?" Gir came into the room, crawling into bed with Zim. "Master…why can't I remember?" "Remember what, Gir?" The robot looked up sadly. "My original purpose for being created. I cannot remember Irk at all." The alien looked pitifully down at him. "Because, Gir, it has been so long since we have been home. You never had a very good memory to begin with, and now you are forgetting. Do you still have those video logs?" Gir nodded. "Then all is well, little friend." "When will we go back to base?" "Soon, Gir. Probably tomorrow." And with that, the two fell asleep.


	7. What Happened To Zim

Dib woke up to find Zim sitting on the kitchen counter, long legs crossed under him, staring at a glass of water. "Good to see you're up." "Irkens heal quickly, foolish human." Dib stopped. "Is that what your kind is called? Irkens?" Zim nodded, never taking his eyes off the water glass. "Where is that?" The green boy looked up. "What?" "Where is Irken?" "Irk, Dib." Zim stared at him for a moment, arguing with himself mentally "Come with me." Zim finally decided, and led Dib to his base, Gir following in his dog disguise. "Computer! Take the three of us to the lab!" "DNA scans show that the enemy DIB has entered the premises. What are your orders?" Zim laughed to himself softly. "Stand down defense protocol. Enemy Dib has access, with accompaniment." "Understood. Transporting to Lab." Suddenly the floor opened and the spaces the three were standing on lowered until they reached the lab.

"Computer! Holographic map of galaxies!" The room went dark and the Milky Way formed in front of the scientists eyes. "We are here, Dib," Zim gestured at the earth. It had a red mark that Dib had seen on some of Zim's weapons. "Irk, is four galaxies North, and two East, past the Asteroids of Dannith." The simulation zoomed in on a small solar system with a few dead rocks and a giant purple planet. "That is Irk. My home planet. Home of the Invaders." The planet was dark and cloudy, looking almost poisonous. "Seems…depressing." Dib said.

"It's very wonderful there. But compared to Earth it is also very dark. But Invaders go off to other planets, so it doesn't bother anyone." Dib stared at the hologram for awhile, looking at all the planets. "What are those symbols?" "That is the Invader symbol. It shows invasions in progress, and those completed or failed. But this is out-dated. Computer! Access Irken Invasion maps and update!" The pictures flickered, and some planets had new symbols. "The red symbol means it has been properly invaded. Purple means it's in progress…" Zim went back to Earth, and tensed.

"What does the red X mean?" "...Failure." Zim's voice was cold and hollow, and his antennae drooped to either side. "Computer. Bring up Irken file on Invader Zim, access code 665273." "File has been marked FAILURE. Zim has been titled as DEFECTIVE and must stay on assigned planet: Earth. If caught outside of Earth's galaxy, Irken is authorized to KILL ON SIGHT." Gray tears swelled in ruby eyes as Zim relived the Tallest' message. "Hey, Zim…" "Computer, take us upstairs, and show The Dib out." Dib was gently placed outside, and as he walked away he heard a horrible, heart-breaking cry come from inside Zim's house. Dib stood there for a while, listening to the alien beg for an answer as to why this happened to him.  
"All I ever wanted was to be worthy! Why will I never be good enough! Why am I such a failure?" Zim was crumpled on the tile floor, Gir trying to comfort him as best he could. "Why!" Dib felt tears spill over his face, and he pushed his glasses up to wipe them away.


	8. A Little Bit Of Help

He couldn't take listening to this. Dib slowly opened the door, and walked over to Zim. The boy didn't realize his presence, though, and jumped when Dib lifted and carried him off to the bedroom he had seen in the camera feed. "I don't understand what I did wrong!" Zim wailed as he was gently placed in his bed, Dib crawling in next to him, pulling the alien close. "You've done nothing wrong, Zim." "LIES! Don't lie to Zim! I have done everything wrong! I am an outcast! A defect!" "Shhhh," Dib started rubbing the ends of Zim's antennae, trying to soothe him.

"Do not lie to me! Do you see this?" Zim sat up, taking off his shirt and showing a tattoo on his right shoulder. The mark he had seen a thousand times in Zim's house. "This is the mark of an _invader_! The mark of a leader! One to conquer a world as their own! And I have failed! I am not worthy to be an Irken!" Gray tears streaked down Zim's face, and those ruby eyes held so much pain that Dib couldn't help but tear up. Slowly, he took off his trench coat, wrapping it around Zim's shoulders, and pulled him against his chest. "That is the mark of an Invader," Dib whispered, "one who is meant to be loyal to his people, and fight until the end for what he believes in. You have never failed as an Invader, Zim." "I cannot take over a simple world such as Earth. I am a failure."

"I understand how you feel…" Dib gently rubbed Zim's antenna, trying to calm the alien's shaking. "How, Dib? Your father is the wealthiest, most respected scientist on earth!" "_Was_, Zim. My father is dead. He died two years ago. Now, I am the out cast son no one wants to remember. Everyone focuses on Gaz. I'm not even considered a Membrane anymore." Zim looked into Dib's amber eyes, now streaked with pain. "The Dib, understands Zim's pain?" "More than I would like to, Zim." The alien picked his next words carefully. "Would Dib…wish to see Irk?" Dib nodded slowly, unsure what was going to happen. "Gir, come here, please." The robot had been at the end of the bed, and now crawled over to his master. "Will you show Invasion Video Log One please?"

A small screen showed out of Gir's chest, and a video recording started. "Gir! Hold still!" Young Zim ordered, placing the camera on the seat next to him on his ship. "Now marks the beginning of my life as an invader! Say goodbye to Irk, Gir," the camera looked out the window. A land of many ships, black grounds, and orderly soldiers came into view. Dark clouds and purple skies filled the air with a menacing atmosphere. "Bye place!" Gir yelled to no one. "Now starts our long journey to Earth! Those foolish earthlings won't know what hit them! I will be their ruler! I am a true Invader now, Gir! I even have the mark!" Young Zim rolled up his sleeve to reveal a freshly made tattoo. "I will not let my Tallest down!" The video stopped, and Zim stared at the still shot of his younger self, smiling hugely as he sat in his new ship.

"It took me six months to reach Earth. I took a video everyday, almost. I wanted to keep accurate logs of my Invasion...now it all seems pretty pointless." Zim seemed very weak, then, and very vulnerable. "You have grown since that video, you know. You're pretty tall compared to all those other guys." Zim chuckled. "I am not the Tallest. I will never be the Tallest." Dib looked down at the boy. "Is your leader really just the tallest of your race?" "_Leaders_, actually. There are two of them. One dresses in purple, one in red, but yes. I have always been one of the shortest." Dib considered all the differences between humans and Irkens. "So, you can't touch water, your leaders are chosen by height, you never eat, and you rarely sleep. And your skin heals quickly."


	9. To The Pancakes!

Zim laughed. "My planet never gets rain, so we never grew immune, height is considered power, my species' evolution allows regeneration, which also makes me sleep less, and I do too eat!" "When! All you ever do at school is stare at your food, or run tests on it!" Zim glared up at the boy. "You foolish human, that is not food that they serve Zim! That is toxic waste! That filth is not worthy of my consumption!" Dib nearly fell off the round bed laughing. "What _does_ an almighty Irken find appetizing these days, Zim? Do enlighten this foolish, ignorant human on the ways of the dominant race!"

Ruby eyes bore into Dib with a classic death-glare. "Snacks. Sugar-filled, fattening snacks. It's considered a delicacy, almost." Dib nodded. "Fine, then. Sugary foods it is!" Dib grabbed Zim's shirt, helped him into it, and dragged the confused alien out the door after both him and the Gir were properly disguised. "Where are you taking me, you insufferable meat-sack?" Dib led the fuming green kid by the hand all the way into a pancake house. "Pancakes! Weeeeeeh!" Gir started spazzing around the room, weaving in and out of tables. No one noticed, oddly.

"Gir! Behave yourself!" The hyper-active robot stopped, and calmly walked over to his master. "Table for two please. And a high-chair," Dib told the waitress, and everyone took their seats, Gir being lifted into the chair. "What can I get you, cutie?" The waitress seemed to be _very_ interested in Zim, who was sitting cross-legged on the seat. "The Sugary Delight, thank you. And give that weird side order to Gir. It seems too disturbing to be consumed by myself." Dib laughed at him. "I'll take the sausage omelet." The waitress was too busy staring at Zim to hear him. Zim looked up. "My friend gave you a demand, you insufferable waste of space."

The girl seemed shocked by the insult, and retook Dib's order. "That wasn't nice, Zim," Dib said when she left. "Zim does not care. She was too busy staring at me, with that disturbing expression, mind you." Dib laughed. "She thinks you're hot. She wants to touch your 'erection'." He started laughing at Zim's expression. "_What?!_" "You heard me! She wants your body, you ignorant alien!" Zim looked absolutely mortified. "That's disgusting! Why would I ever find her worth my time, let alone worth mating with?!" Dib was hysterical, and Gir started laughing as well, even though he didn't know what was going on.

"Well, lately you fit the criteria of attractiveness on Earth." Zim gave his famous, skeptical look. "What's that?" "Lean, fit, high cheek bones, etcetera." The Irken looked Dib up and down. "What do you mean? You are all of those things, and no females want you!" Dib blushed. "Fuck you, Zim!" The alien's antennae twitched a little. "Sorry. No _males_ find an interest in you." Dib glared. "Yeah, I caught that." The girl didn't stop hovering over Zim, trying to get him to ask for her number. Clearly she had gotten over the insult.


	10. Something More

"How do I get her to stay away?" Zim begged after she gave him the third refill in five minutes. They hadn't even gotten their food yet! Dib laughed. "You just need to pretend you're with someone else," Zim's antennae twitched. "Pretend you have a mate!" "Oh. I see." The alien smiled to himself when the girl walked over again, and looked around to make sure no one the two boys knew where in the pancake house. "Do you need anything else?"

"Directions to the bathroom, please," The waitress smiled proudly, apparently taking Zim's self-satisfied smirk as an invitation for some fun in the bathroom. _Whore,_ Dib thought. "Right over here," Zim turned back. "Don't run off without me," he said, and planted a kiss onto the shocked lips of the gothic boy. The waitress was fuming, sending death-glares at Dib, who was too confused to react. Zim, satisfied that he got rid of his stalker, and laughing to himself at Dib's expression, walked off to the bathroom. Dib was sitting there red-faced when he got back. What Zim failed to realize, thankfully, was the Dib had gotten a slight hard-on. _Must be from the lack of affection from anyone..._

Finally, the food arrived, but the girl seemed very upset the rest of the time, even when Zim looked utterly adorable as he wolfed down his chocolate pancakes with chocolate chips, whipped cream, and powdered sugar. Zim looked like a little kid, eating happily. Gir was eating Zim's hash browns and toast. "I love toast!" "Gir, be quiet. We're in a public place." Dib scolded, but that didn't change the robots enthusiasm to chew on the bread, getting jam all over his face.

After everyone had eaten, Gir jumped over the table and sat in Zim's lap, squealing happily. "Gir, you'd made a mess." Zim laughed, wiping off the jam as best he could. "Come on, let's go home and wash you off." Gir giggled and jumped down, a leash extending from his collar. "Come along, Dib." The alien led the two to his house, and threw Gir's costume on the floor. "Computer! Wash that for me, will you?" "Yes, sir!" A tube enclosed around the outfit and it was sucked away somewhere.

Zim took out his contacts slowly, setting them in a small bowl. "These things irritate my eyes so much." It was always weird seeing Zim's real eyes. Dib was always so used to his contacts, that the ruby eyes seemed...alien. _No pun intended_, Dib thought to himself. The green boy took off his wig and stretched his antennas, almost like Dib did in the morning with his arms.

Dib couldn't help but notice Zim's slim waist, after all, he _was_ wearing super-tight jeans. His slight hard-on returned, irritating Dib a little. _Cut it out, you!_ He thought harshly, thinking of the waitress to calm himself down. "So, I've never gotten a full tour of your house." Zim eyed him suspiciously before nodding and walking off. Unsure of what to do, Dib followed, curious to where he was being led. Zim walked down the hallway, opening up doors and naming the contents. "Bathroom, closet, weapons room, invention closet, Gir's recharging room," He ended at the end of the hall. "My bedroom,"

The alien opened the door into the room he had originally been crying in. Dib finally got a good look at the room. A small desk with a foreign laptop, a lamp, and the round bed filled the room. The white pillows were stained with grey tears. Without thinking, Dib wrapped his arms around the aliens slim waist, and without thinking, Zim leaned into his arms. An odd feeling swept over the two of them, and the Zim blushed. "What is this, Dib?" Dib shrugged. "A crush?" Zim's antennas twitched. "We like each other?" Twitch. "We want to be mates!" Dib said, frustrated with the green skinned boy. "But, the Dib hates Zim." "That was so long ago, Zim."

The alien looked very confused, and seemed to be battling himself. "I have felt this sensation before, long ago, when we first met, and periodically thereafter." Dib was surprised. "This is a good thing?" Dib nodded. Zim's accent made him seem….mysterious. Dib decided this softness the alien had recently developed made his voice soothing and kind of sexy. "This is a good thing." "What is Zim supposed to do?" "Just tell me when you get uncomfortable." Dib leaned in when he knew Zim understood, and kissed him gently. He could tell Zim's antennae were spazzing out, twitching erotically. When Dib tried to pull back, though, Zim put his hand behind Dib's head.


	11. My Alien Boyfriend

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Zim pulled back suddenly. "I do not know how humans mate." Dib smiled softly, and explained the whole process. He had had a summer fling with a gothic boy from out of town, and had sex with him a couple of times, so he knew what to do. Zim looked relieved. "Good, our species are capable of mating. We are the same in that aspect." Dib laughed softly. Zim suddenly looked scared. "I did not mean that we are to mate!" Dib laughed harder. "I figured as much, Zim." The alien looked relieved. "Good." "How about cuddling?" After explaining what cuddling was to Zim, he agreed excitedly. "I have always wished to cuddle." So, the two crawled into Zim's round bed and fell asleep in each others arms, Gir at the foot of the bed.

Monday morning Dib's phone alarm went off, and he looked down to see his old enemy nuzzled up against his chest. _How adorable,_ Dib thought with a smile. He reached out and rubbed the end of one of Zim's antennas, waking him up. "Good morning, Dib. You know how to give Zim an erection, fucker." Dib laughed at how wrong that sounded with his accent. "Sorry, Zim, but it's time to get up for school." Zim pouted a little. "Drat…School…" The word seemed to give Zim a bad taste in his mouth.

The two got dressed, Zim reaching out to rub Dib's smooth chest. "How soft…." He noted. After breakfast they headed to school on the bus. Only after sort of becoming boyfriends, did they realize how many classes the boys had together. Almost all of the classes and lunch were together. "This makes Zim happy." Zim was beaming as they sat together at lunch. "Me too," Dib didn't know what to make of this odd relationship, but he liked it, and that's all that mattered. He hadn't smiled in a very long time, but he was beaming at how excited Zim was to hold hands with Dib.

"Is Zim the Dib's…what did Dib call it….boyfriend?" Dib paused on their walk back to Zim's house. "If you want to be, but that would mean we kiss and hug and cuddle, and hang out all the time. Is that what you want?" Zim nodded excitedly. "Then yes. You're my alien boyfriend." Zim beamed. "Zim is pleased." Dib laughed at how adorable Zim was being.

"This is an odd behavior for you. I've never seen you happy." Dib noted when they were at Zim's house, and the alien was still smiling giddily and holding Dib's hand. "Zim has never been happy…" The boy seemed to be struggling with something. "Can Zim tell the Dib a secret?" Dib nodded. "I was considering….what is the word….Gir!" The robot wandered in. "Translate something for me." Zim said something in his language, and Gir told him simply, "Suicide," and walked away. Dib couldn't comprehend what was being said. "Wait…suicide? You wanted to commit _suicide?_" Zim nodded slowly. "How would that happen? You heal so fast…" "Water," Zim said simply.

"Wait a minute! Is that why you had water that morning?" Zim nodded again. Dib didn't even know that suicide was something universal. "It is considered the greatest disgrace on my planet…only cowards take their own life…" Zim whispered that word he spoke to Dib, meaning suicide, like it made his stomach churn. Dib pulled his new boyfriend into his arms, trying to wash away Zim's pain by rubbing his antenna. "I'm glad you didn't. Now you can be happy."


	12. New Phones

After a few days of sleeping at Zim's after school, Dib walked home alone. Privacy was key in any relationship. Coming through the door seemed alien to him. His house was no longer his home. He crawled up the stairs into his room, flopping on the bed. Gaz was probably in the lab again. He opened the box of old pictures, sifting through them. "Wow, I was a crappy photographer." Dib had recently taken a liking to photography. Getting agitated at all the fuzzy pictures of Zim smiling, he ran over to Zim's house with his fancy camera.  
Zim rubbed his eyes from lack of contacts, and opened the door. "Dib? What are you doing here?" Dib smiled sheepishly, revealing the camera. "I don't have any good pictures of my new boyfriend." Zim's smile slowly grew across his face, and he led Dib to his bedroom for a photo shoot. They took all kind of pictures, some of them kissing, Zim's alien tongue occasionally snaking into Dib's mouth. They made silly faces, and Gir eventually joined in. When Zim fell asleep in Dib's arms, he took a picture of them cuddling, and put the camera on the nightstand. Suddenly his phone went off his in pocket.  
"_Where are you? You haven't been home for days." _He was surprised his sister even cared. "_I'm at my boyfriend's house, cuddling." "Is that even possible for you?!" _Dib laughed a little, told her he'd be home tomorrow, and shut off his phone. Dib wrapped his arms around Zim's slim body, loving the feeling of warmth that followed. Without thinking twice, he kissed Zim on the forehead, and felt his antennas twitch a little.  
Dib thought back to when Zim was still his enemy, and Dib had sworn to dissect him. He chuckled to himself, and fell asleep.  
Dib went home the next day after school, and realized Zim didn't actually have a phone, so they couldn't text. "Hm. That's gonna change now." "Where are you going?" Gaz questioned as Dib headed for the door with a spare phone in his pocket. "What do you care?" Gaz glared at him, her purple hair falling a little into her face. "We are related, you know. I'm allowed to care." "Let me guess, someone got hurt in the lab again?" "...yes, but that doesnt me-" "Later, Gaz! I'll be right back, just going to drop something off! I'll make dinner when I get home!" Dib shut the door and bounded towards Zim's house.  
"Zim opened the door, confused. "The Dib said Zim would not see him today." Dib laughed. "Good to see you too. Here." Zim looked at the phone, antennaes twitching. "I put my number in it already. I hacked into the satelites so you don't have to pay for it. We can talk when we aren't near each other now." Zim looked up. "My computer does that, Dib. Did you miss Zim that bad? Silly human." With that, Zim shut the door. Dib wasn't entirely sure how to take that response.  
Before even reaching his house, Dib got a text from Zim. "ZIMMM dOESnt unDErsntad This risuvckous macCHNE!" Dib nearly fell over laughing. "Gaz! What do you want for dinner?" "Make your casserole!" "No wonder you wanted me home! You only wanted my food!" "Shut up, Dib!" Dib laughed, and started dinner. For once he was actually in a good mood. Dinner was cheerful, and Gaz told Dib about the parasite that escaped and nearly killed her assistant. "Serves him right for not handling it right. The instructions sounded pretty clear." Gaz sighed. "I know, right? Imbiciles."  
Dib got another text from Zim. "Wosrt PeiCE of Junk EVer!" "Who's that?" "Zim." Gaz nearly choked on her food. "WAit, ZIM is your boyfriend?! The dude you wouldn't stop calling an alien?" Dib laughed. "He is an alien. Just a cute one." Gaz rolled her eyes. "Boys. Ridiculous." "Just eat your food, Gaz." Dib replied to Zim, trying to explain how to actually use the phone. "Donot TELL ZiM WhaT to Do! I REFUSE TO USE THIS CONTAPTSHUN" Dib laughed, and logged onto his computer.  
Before Dib could do anything, though, a webchat started without his permission. Zim had decided to hack his computer to talk to him. "Hello, Zim. Enjoying the phone?" Zim glared. "No,Zim is most certainly NOT enjoying this piece of junk. I cannot even type in Irken!" Dib laughed. "The phone company doesn't know Irk even exists!" "Either way, I've made my OWN version of such a contraption." Zim held up a weird purple device to the camera. It almost looked like a smart phone, but it was circular and showed weird foreign text for the buttons. "I can use this one. Yours is junk, Dib."  
Dib shook his head. "Okay, whatever works for you, sweetie." Zim looked around behind him, then back at Dib. "What?" "Who are you talking to?" Dib looked at him. "Who is 'swee-tea?'" Dib facepalmed. "I was talking to you, stupid. It's a petname." Zim looked angry. "I am not a pet! I am a superior race of alien!" Dib smacked his head on the desk. "No. It's a form of affection on earth. It's a nickname that couples use with each other. Don't you have those?" Zim thought about it for a moment, then typed something onto his computer. Apparently whatever he found on his screen made sense, because Zim finally got what Dib was calling him.  
"On my planet we don't really have affection. But there is a very old term that is no longer used for lovers, which is _merrzah_." The way Zim's tongue rolled over the word showed how different the two languages were. Dib knew he would never be able to replicate it. a soft rumbling came into Zim's voice when he spoke the word, and his snake tongue twisted slightly. "So, Irkens don't really date, do they?" "No. Not really." "Why?" Zim didn't even take a moment to think on this, instead he simply stated "Irkens need no one."


	13. A Short History Lesson

Paste your document here... Dib sighed. "If Irkens need no one, then why do you have the word? Hmm?" This made Zim pause. "Well, actually there's a story behind it. A very long time ago, before Irk had a cxraving for extreme power, there was a queen who ruled over a distant planet. She came to visit Irk to speak of trade routes between the planets, and our ancient leader fell in love with her. Her name in Irken tongue was _Merrzah_. She was said to be the most beautiful of all the galaxies. In her land, she was the sanctum of love. Their children were the tallest of Irken kind, like their mother. When she was murdered during a war with another planet, the king fell ill from a broken heart. It was a dark time for Irk. It was said that when she had visited, the skies of Irk had been blue,like Earth, but now they are filled with the pain of our leader, _Irknaaj_. And now, we exact revenge against our leaders broken heart, and _Merrzah_'s murderer. But we stopped loving sometime afterwards, and now we only feel desire to rule."  
Dib was pretty speechless over this little history lesson. "Wow...that's so...weird...what was her real name? In her tongue?" Zim struggled with the word. "Afro-die-tea?" Dib's jaw dropped. "Are you trying to tell me that the Greek Goddess of Love was your leaders girlfriend? I don't remember that in history class!" Zim laughed. "Actually, no, not the same woman. I remember my confusion when i heard about your planet's version of the woman. Not the same, but perhaps the greek myth came from her planet. Who knows?" Dib decided that a conspiracy theorey could sprout from this entire situation, but left it alone.  
"Well, on my planet, love is the reason for war, murder, violence, and rebellions." Zim's antennaes twitched. "Seems a little counter-productive, don't you think?" Dib laughed. "I never said Humans made any damn sense." Suddenly Gir jumped into the screen "HAI THERE! You look tasty!" Gir started licking the screen, to Zim's horror. "Gir! What is _wrong_ with you?!" The screen went black, and Dib decided now would be a good time to go to bed.


	14. Well, Shit

AUTHORS NOTE: Sorry guys! I know I haven't been uploading DX I've ben depressed. Anyway! I've written a LOT and I will be uploading regularly

Dib woke up in a good mood the next day, despite having to go to school. "What's wrong with you? Is Zim really that good of a boyfriend?" Gaz looked like her brother had been replaced with a robot. A very unconvincing robot. "Yeah, I think he is." "Does he still have that stupid dog? That thing creeps me out." Gaz made a face as she made her breakfast. "Yes, he still has Gir, and Gir is still stupid." Just then Dib's phone went off. Instead of actual letters, though, random foreign symbols went across the screen. Dib scrolled down. More random symbols. He hit reply. "Zim, I think you forgot to make your phone translate out of Irken. Your language looks weird."

A few minutes later Zim replied. "Irken language is far more logical than English! At least Irkens all speak one language! Half your planet can't speak to each other!" Dib laughed and decided it was a little weird that one planet has a bunch of other languages in it."Well, I'm off to skool!" Dib started off down the sidewalk to Skool. Dib was so busy day dreaming he forgot to pick up his new alien boyfriend, and instead walked to his first class. Suddenly he got a text. "Dib-filth was supposed to walk Zim to skool. Zim is angered." Dib swore under his breath.

Dib tried to apologize, but Zim simply texted random Irken words, which were probably curse words ad insults. The day continued, and Zim completely avoided Dib. By the time lunch hit, Dib was such a mess that he had to figure out a way to gain forgiveness. He remembered his locker he put a special lock on when he first got to High Skool. He rushed to it, skipped lunch, and hopped to any god that Zim might believe in on his planet that there was something in there to save his ass.

He pulled open the locker hesitantly, and rummaged through all the gadgets. "Come on...come on...YES!" Dib yelled louder than he had expected, and everyone looked at him funny. Nothing new. Dib was too excited to care. He grabbed a decoder and plugged it into his phone. He took about half of his next class setting up a new code file for Irken language. Within a few minutes he had the language cracked, and uploaded it onto his phone, ready to use. Now all he had to do was think of something...sweet.


	15. A Poem, of Sorts

"Hmmm..." Dib was never one for poetry. It took him until 4th hour to figure out what to do. He grabbed his laptop out of his messenger and started his magic. "Okay, now let's find Gir...hmm...Ah! There you are, you little metallic dork!" The science teacher cleared his throat, but since Dib was six chapters and eighteen labs ahead, he left Dib alone. Dib searched through Gir's database and memory for any poems that Zim might have fallen for since coming to Earth. "Nothing on the surface...not surprising...hmm...next layer, nope...How about the video recordings?" Dib plugged in his headset, and set up a complicated searching code into his laptop. "...hmm, three results." Dib played them through. "Um, well that was completely useless."

Something dawned onto Dib."Wait...Gir's mentally retarded. Duh." Dib was forced to flip through all the videos, since their names were completely ridiculous. "Hmm, let's try 'River Sing-Song Time.'" What Dib found was completely by luck. Zim was dancing around the kitchen, much younger, but was starting to take to wearing black skinny jeans and his usual dress-shirt thing. He seemed to be eating whipped topping for pie right out of the container with a spoon. "Gir, I've found a new favorite song. Or is it a poem? Hmm. Zim is usure. Gir, Zim shall read it off to you and you shall anayze it, alright?"

The camera nodded excitedly. Zim took another spoonful of whipped cream. "Sweet love, Sweet love, send your joy onto me. My lonely soul cannot feel the raindrops on my skin." Zim paused to eat some more whipped cream, "My eyes are gray storm clouds in my mind, and i tried to give my beating heart but i see now it's hard to find. My chest is filled with blacken moods, hurtful thoughts, and self abuse." Another spoonful, "Sweet love, Sweet love, whisper special nothings in my ear. My nightmares consume my waking self, and my blood spills freely, and pools." Zim's snake tongue licked up the rest of the whipped cream and tossed the container in the trash.

Dib paused the video, and typed in some complex coding to get the text of that poem onto his phone. He translated it into Irken, and sent it to Zim, excited and confident. Dib pretended to listen to the teacher, but he was too excited to get a response. Oddly, no response came. And the next period came, and still nothing. Skool ended with no reply. Confused, he started on his walk home, but was slammed into, and knocked down. "what the fu-" "Zim is sorry." Zim's accent was extremely thick, and his voice came out in a squeak. Gray tears were streaming down his face, and he had a death grip on Dib.

Before he realized who had tackled him, Dib had been pissed, but his anger was long forgotten in the messy black hair and foreign tongue flickering behind makeup stained lips. Dib picked himself off the ground, and Zim with him, and hugged his boyfriend tightly. "Dibblet comes home with Zim." "Alright, let me just tell my sister." Dib sent a quick text to Gaz, who simply replied "k" Not even bothering to capitalize? Dib thought as the two walked home. Zim seemed hesitant to hold Dib's hand, and instead held onto the sleeve of his jacket. That was fine by Dib, as long as he was happy.


	16. Speak As A Whole

The two walked into Zim's house, and were greeted by Gir. "Master! Hai! I missed yooo!" The robot jumped up into Zim's arms, wiggling around giddily. "Yes, Gir, I missed you, too." Zim played with Gir as if he were a small child, or a dog. He waved a stuffed pig in front of Gir, who grabbed the toy and shoved it into his mouth. "Gir, go play. We'll have dinner at zecht." "Okay!" Gir jumped down and ran off.

"Zekt? What's that?" Zim laughed. "It means seven thirty. Gir doesn't understand Earth's time very well, so I just use Irken." "Oh. Alright." Din plopped down on the couch, but the couch suddenly bucked him off. "What the fuck?!" A metallic laughing came from everywhere at once. "Computer! Baakdna zi clahrr flekk peezke!"

Zim's angered yelling in his native language amazed Dib. He watches Zim's tongue twist slightly when he over stressed his vowels, and some of the noises sounded like a combination of cricket chirps and the cries of a sheep. The computer replied in English, though. " I was simply following your orders, sir!"

"Qeht zee nogg ke merkke chek blee zi glaa!" A pause, and some clicking came from Zim's mouth, and Dib knew he would never be able to flick his tongue like he could. "It is done, sir, Dib is given access to the house." Zim glared at the ceiling before turning back to Dib, who was still on the floor. "Zim is sorry, I forgot to tell the house you're no longer my enemy."

"Ah," Dib took Zim's hand and was helped up. "You're language sounds cool." Zim's antennas twitch a little. "I doubt anyone on earth could mimick that language." Zim looked confused. "It's not hard, really," Zim tried to show Dib how to say his name in Irken. "Your name is Maakdna. Maakdna." Dib watched the way Zim's lips curled, and tongue flickered. "Mocked-nah." Zim laughed as Dib got more and more frustrated. "Mocked-nah! What the hell, how do you do that?" Zim erupted into laughter. "Humans use their mouth to speak, Irkens use their entire being to communicate. Here," Zim put Dib's hand on his chest. "Maakdna," A deep vibration came from Zim's chest over the stressed aa. "Dib must speak with his entire self." Just then Gir walked in.

"Can Gir say it right?" Zim looked down at the robot. "No, not really. Robots do not have the being to do so. Watch, Gir, speak Dibs Irken name." Gir's gears could be heard before he spoke. What came out sounded like a sheet of metal being shoved through a paper shredder. "Maaaaakkk-dnaaahhh" the word was stretched out and over stressed. It sounded as though Gir was malfunctioning. "What the hell?"


	17. Anatomy and Dinner

Zim nodded slowly. "Thank you, Gir. So you see? It's impossible for him." Dib watched Gir stick out his tongue and walk into another room, like he didn't just try to make Dib's ears bleed. "That's weird that your planet made him, but he can't speak your language." Zim shrugged.

"That's just how it is. It's completely understandable." Dib nodded, but he wasn't sure if he understood. "Try again."

Dib sighed, and tried to make a rumbling in his chest as he spoke. "Maaak-dnaahhhh." The word came out hoarse, like a cat coughing up a hair ball. Zim giggled, which sounded slightly off key through his alien tongue. "You know, I've never seen you giggle before." Pain washed over Zim, but was quickly masked with a smile.

"The Dib has never tried to speak my language before." Dib got frustrated. "You make it look so easy. I cannot make that noise with my chest." Zim sighed and turned to the ceiling. "Computer, bring up my anatomy X-ray." A screen lowered from the ceiling and an X-ray of Zim showed up. Zim pointed to a knot in his chest. "This makes that noise. Computer, what is the human equivalence?" An X-ray of an average human showed next to Zim's. The vocal chords lit up. "This is the closest equivalence, sir." "Can it replicate the Irken language noises?" A few clicks and beeps came from the computer. "With some difficulty and practice, yes. But an odd accent will occur."

Zim tilted his head. "Show me what it will sound like." More beeps and a voice recording played "maaaakdnaaah." Dib didn't hear much of an accent, but could tell that the computer struggled to produce that sound. Zim grimaced. "A thick accent, indeed. It's better than the Beknodes." "The what?" If Dib had anntenae, they'd be twitching.

"They look like Earth crickets. But bigger. Their attempts at Irken makes Gir's sound like a songbird." Dib shuddered at the thought and left it alone. "How about some dinner?" Dib looked at him funny. "I forget you actually eat." Zim stuck his snake tongue out. "Gir! Make some waffles!" A small pause and Gir called back "Done!"

"Damn he's fast, but waffles for dinner?" Zim nodded happily, like a little kid at a parade. Everyone sat down at the table for dinner, which felt awkward. Dib sat stiff, staring at the two dig into their food. Zim looked up between bites. "What's wrong?" Dib realized he had been holding his breath, and swallowed a lump in his throat. "I...don't know...I've ever eaten at a table...like a family...before...Dad was always working...and Gaz never cared..." Zim reached over and took his hand. "Well, human commercials have informed Zim that eating at a round shelf will increase meal satisfaction. Therefore, we sit."


	18. Never Insult Gir

Dib laughed at Zim's interpretation of commercials. "Well, they expect a family, not an alien and his retarded robot dog, and you're not supposed to sit cross-legged in the chair." Zim cocked his head. "Why not? It's comfortable!" Zim tried to mimick Dib's position, but decided he liked sitting his way better. Gir, who had bee silently eating, face planted into his plate of waffles, and got syrup everywhere.

"Gir! What the hell?!" Dib jumped up before the syrup bottle toppled onto him, and instead crashed to the floor. "Gir, Klahh zi bekk, jaa nerr mekk zi zaa!" When Gir looked up, his eyes were red and he looked obediently at his master. After saluting, he jumped up out of the chair and quickly cleaned up the mess he made. He washed the dishes, wiped down the table, and threw the tablecloth onto the floor. The cloth was sucked away to be cleaned. Once everything was spotless, Gir turned blue again, and fell to the floor, clearly using all the mental energy he had.

"Is he okay?" Zim nodded. "He does that after actually following orders like he was programmed to. Quite ironic, really, he was made to adapt and help conquer this plant by my side, and I can only get him to clean the kitchen." Dib chuckled, and tried to ick up Gir to put him on the couch. Before he could touch Gir, though, the robot jumped up and ran out of the rom, squealing loudly.

"What the fuck is wrong with him?!" Zim glared. "There is nothing wrong with Gir! He wasnt properly programmed! He was an unmade robot that wasnt supposed to work at all! He's a stupid robot for a stupid invader who thought he was good enough to rule!" Apparently, that was a button Dib was never meant to push. Note to self, never insult Gir. Ever.


	19. Gir, In All Seriousness

Dib pulled Zim in for a hug, but Zim refused. "Zim is fine." A stern collectiveness came across his green face, and he strolled out of the room. When Dib went into the living room to look for him, all he found was Gir on the couch. "Gir? Why's Zim still so angry about the Invader thing?"

Gir seemed to get a look of intelligence across his metallic face. "Master is Irken," his voice was soft and deeper than normal, "as such they are bred and raised to conquer. It is their one and only goal in life. No Irken has ever failed as Master has.

"When Master, and the others, were first starting to walk, they were known as the Prodigy Generation. They were meant to bring Irk to glory...But, as you well know, Irkens are reliant on their height for a good life. Zim was the smallest in Irken history. He was meant to be great, a prodigy, the best of them all. He was originally put under the wing of our rulers.

"Zim was originally growing at a fast rate for his age. He was faster, smarter, and more talented than all of his brothers and sisters. Rumors went around that he would be the next ruler. But, for reasons nobody understood, Zim simply stopped growing. It effected his performance, but he was given a chance nonetheless. He went a bit insane because he was bullied on Irk."

Gir's voice was barely audible, but Dib was so intent on the words he heard every false breath Gir took. "He...destroyed most of a great Irken city. They banished him. And when he returned, begging for another chance, they dumped him here, to get rid of him. They also gave him me, a faulty robot that doesn't work quite right. He got the smallest ship, as well. But Master was just so happy...so happy..."

Gir's voice died out, and his depression sunk into his very core. Something inside of him seemed to just die, and if he could cry, he would. Dib watched Gir sink into himself, and shut down. He walked through the house, looking for Zim. When he couldn't find him, he decided he should just go home, and left.


	20. A Park Party

The next day Zim wasn't at school, but Dib had been expecting it. When Dib was at lunch, though, he got a text. He had to translate it from Irken, and it read, "Meet me at the park after school". Dib closed it without replying, and simply strolled to the park after last bell.

The air was crisp and chilly, but the sun offered some warmth. Dib walked down the sidewalk, hands deep in his pockets, and occasionally adjusting his glasses. As he rounded the corner he could hear Gir's squeals of over-active joy, and nearly went into a crouch. Old habits die hard, Dib thought, shaking his head to himself. He leaned against a post and watched Zim for a moment. He was attempting to keep Gir on a leash, but Gir was too stupid to realize this, so was dragging Zim around the park. "Stop it, Gir! I'm the one who pulls you around! You're the dog!" Gir was too busy chasing a bee to hear him, so, checking to make sure they were alone (and not noticing Dib), Zim sent out a metal arm from his PAK, which grabbed Gir and suspended him in front of Zim's angered face.

"Now, Gir, you listen to me. I am the master here, so you shall do as Zim commands!" Zim's accent thickly showed his anger, and Gir began to cry. Not real tears, because he was a robot, but some odd fake tears that always seemed like a design flaw to Dib. Zim sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, and the arm set Gir down. "Nerrgaz zi fey jui sokke nazz ze?" Gir nodded, and hugged Zim's leg. Dib walked into view then, and for some reason Gir decided that was a good time to start being a proper robot.


	21. A Proper Robot, and a Walk to the Movies

"WAAAHHHH!" Gir screeched at the top of his lungs (so to speak), and shot a net onto Dib. Gir was completely red, and jumped onto his prey, tangling Dib in the net. "WHAT THE FUCK, GIR?!" "GIR! ZEKK PAH JO GUAA TEEK MAKK DA JI!" Gir's body turned blue again, and he fell onto the grass next to Dib. "When did The Dib get here?" Zim questioned, helping Dib out of the net, and on his feet. "About the same time you blew your top." Zim's antenna twitched, but Dib left it alone.

"So, what did you want to meet for?" Zim seemed to remember something, and his eyes have away his embarrassment for forgetting. "Zim simply wanted some air." Dib knew that was a huge load of crap, and stared down at Zim with a skeptical look. "Well, Zim is simply...what's the word...Gir! Translate! Zi baak dei thiet!" Dib decided he would never get used to the way Zim's tongue curled against his teeth as he spoke. "Depressed." Gir translated, emotionless and robot-like, as unlikely as that ironically was.

Dib nodded, and the two went for a walk together. The sky was grey and depressive, and the buildings leaned down towards the two, glaring at this gothic couple. The people, grotesque and boring, passed by aimlessly, making sure not to touch the tree of them. October was here, and the leaves burned themselves out from will do live. They floated to ground, losing the battle as they crunched under boots. The air was chilly, but Zim seemed unaffected. Instead, he seemed to enjoy the wind wrapping itself around him, like it wasn't trying to cause a shiver.

"What's wrong, Dib-let?" Zim finally noticed his boyfriend shaking. "What do you mean? It's freezing!" Zim looked up at the ominous clouds. "I find it warm. Feels like Irk's summer." A slight nostalgic depression came and went with the wind. "Your planet sounds horribly cold." Zim nodded slowly, like he never really noticed. "I suppose so." "How does it not snow?" Zim pondered the question carefully. "Well, there's no moisture to suck up. And the clouds are simply there to suck in the toxic air. Or, it would be toxic if you went there. For Irkens, though, it's not a problem."

Dib wasn't sure how toxic air wasn't lethal to the alien, but just knocked it off to evolution. Strange, awkwardly useless at times, and fascinating, but evolution nonetheless. As they continued, the air started to warm slightly, due to the towns lights pouring out heat into the air, and Dib eventually stopped shaking. They ended up at a small abandond theater, and Zim seemed extremely interested. "Let's go inside!" The alien bounced on his toes giddily, and rushed in without an answer.


	22. Real Alien Horror Stories

"Wait!" Dib ran after him, but Zim had disappeared. "Zim?" He kept whispering, with no response. Eventually, he found Gir, his eyes providing blue light in one of the theaters. "Dib! Zim found a movie!" He called from the lobby, and after a few moments he rushed in, wheel of film in hand. "What movie is it?" Dib checked. "I think it's an old movie about aliens." Zim decided he wanted to watch it, so Dib put it into the machine. Sitting in a tiny theater room, and finding some untouched popcorn seeds, the two watched a black and white Martian movie.

"Martians. Those guys weren't even born there. Your Martians are from the seventh fixation galaxy. They wanted to spy in earth, but left after this stuff came out on your planet. They never came to the Milky Way again. And they aren't green, either. It was the atmosphere of mars. They're actually purple. And they're called Bictnahs. Very stupid race, indeed." Dib was surprised by Zim's knowledge on the matter, and couldn't take Martians seriously after that.

A woman screamed down a dirt path, which seemed necessary in every old horror movie. "Why doesn't she just throw sheep milk? They'll burn right up. Odd weakness, but effective in the war involving them and Irk." "Seriously? Sheep milk?" Dib laughed. "Fluids seem to cripple you guys, huh?" Zim glared. "Well, the Roach people hate fire, and the Gorfoes can't withstand high pitch wails. Those who vacation on Pluto, I think they're called Dockens, can't handle sunlight. They burn up. You would call them vampires, I believe. But they're very small."

Dib couldn't help but laugh. "What?" He shook his head. "Scientists would kill for that information." Zim shrugged. "Who cares? At Earth's rate, you won't leave the galaxy anytime in this century. Or the next three." Unfortunately, Dib couldn't argue. Zim laughed through the entire movie, and commented on the inaccuracy of the races. "That's not even a race of aliens! Those are similar to the Estonian pets! Lap dogs, more specifically." Dib figured Estonians must be gigantic, if those were small to them.


	23. Bathroom Walls Would Have A Lot To Say

After the movie ended, they decided to make the theater a permanent hideout for them. They swept the floor, and Zim's PAK shot out a dozen metallic arms, which cleaned the whole place in under a half an hour. "Where's Gir?" Zim finally realized his robot was missing, and went to search for him. "Gir! Where are you?" A metallic squeal came from behind the old consession stand. Gir had found the slushie maker that was placed below the register, and was spinning inside the bucket that held the drink. "Gir, what are you doing?" "Imma swirrrlin'!" Zim turned off the giant metal contraption, and it yawned to a stop. Gir hopped out, disappointed, and went to a corner to mope.

"I'll go use the bathroom, and we can go." Dib left to find the restroom, but found that the men's room was locked. The women's bathroom wasn't, surprisingly, and he decided to just use that. He walked into a small, poorly lit stall, choosing the one that had a working lock, and sat down. He noticed many scratches that were carved onto the walls, toilet paper dispenser, and the small trash box screwed to the wall next to him. As he watched, trying to make out what the old marks were saying, they seemed to shift and sway, unable to decide what sentence to present. It was almost as if the author of these scratches had writer's block, and it showed greatly in her work. The walls finally settled, and Dib was able to read them.

"'Casey Matthew is a total..'" The last word continued shifting, long after the sentence was cleared, as if it couldn't decide how to best describe the girl in question. "'...bitch...whore...fatass...'" Unsure how the word changed so dramatically before his amber eyes, he finally gave up and went to another, hopefully more informative, sentence. "'For a good time, call 425-BlowHim.' Huh, weird." He saved the number in his phone, just so he could run it through his computer to see who was on the other end.

Dibs eyes settled on a scratch mark, re-sketched in black pen and red marker, that was surrounded by multicolored lipsticks, which Dib found unsanitary. "'The hottest guy I know is...'" The sentence cut off, and a lost list of boy's names appeared down the wall. The one that showed the most was hilarious i of itself. "'Foreign Exchange Student. The one with the blue eyes, olive skin, and sexy accent!'" A long conversation of agreeable comments and arguement over his name continued across the rest of the stall. It seemed the girls decided to call him Greece, because for some reason he looked Greek. Dib realized all the girls who took part in this chatroom were complete idiots.

He left the bathroom, remembering when the theater was closed. It was only a year ago, but all the things inside of it were ancient, as this place was handed down three generations. Faded blue and green paint lined the walls, and 60's style orange shag carpet lined the viewing areas. Old movie posters, ancient and nonworking arcade games sat in a corner, and the lights hung haphazardly from the cieling, creaking with every swing. The lobby floor was linoleum, and his boots made loud thamp thamp thamp souds as he walked. Cobwebs lined the cieling, and a few spiders lounged comfortably from their newly-built beds. The webs reflected the poor light, sending a slight gleam onto the walls.


	24. Chess: More Complex Than You

Dib had realized after awhile that Zim was nowhere to be found. "Zim?" After walking around for a few minutes, he heard a soft laughter, a good distance away. "Zim?" Dib turned the corner to see Zim looking at movie posters that were kept in storage; he was specifically interested in the alien ones. "Look, Dib! They consider this to be an advanced race!" The boy broke into hysterics as he showed Dib a poster of a generic alien in a metallic suit, hlding a poorly made laser gun. "I looked like this for a costume party, once. Everyone found it hilarious! The Stiflos couldn't stop spitting out their Claughnah!" Dib chuckled softly; not because he understood a thing Zim said about the party, but because he could imagine Zim in a shiny silver Hazmat suit with a watergun.

"Well, Mr. LifeOfTheParty, why dont we go to my house?" Zim agreed, and hung the poster back on the wall. Before leaving, Dib put a combination lock on the door, so nobody could get in but them. "Why do you have that?" Dib shrugged. "I dunno. It was in my locker." The three had a decent walk home, until they were at Dib's front door. Zim seemed extremely uncomfortable, and his antennae drooped behind his head. "What's wrong?" Zim stared at the door, mortified at the thought of crossing under it. "What if your sister is home? Zim does not like The Dib's sister..." His voiced seemed to trail off, and the alien was lost in some frightening thought. "She's not home. You'll be fine." Dib reached out his hand for Zim, who hesitantly took it into a deathgrip.

They walked in, Dib half dragging, half leading Zim on, only to find a video game paused on the giant television screen."What's that?" Dib laughed. "Don't they have video games on your planet?" Zim cocked his head to side, and his antennae made him look like a cartoon dog. Dib sighed and unpaused it. He ran up to a random bad guy, and sliced him with a bloody, oversized chainsaw. Extremely inaccurate amounts of blood hit the screen, and Dib repaused. "Gross." Zim looked at the screen's blood spatter with disgust. "That's a form on etertainment? It's no wonder there's so much violence and punishable offences on this planet." "Well, what do Irkens do for fun?" Zim called Gir over, and pulled out a small device from his head. "This is what we do for fun." Zim switched it on, and set it on the floor. A holographic, foreign board game came up. The board was 13x25 squares, with five different rows of colors.

The first row, closest to Dib with a deep blue color, had grotesque pieces lined up carefully. A small serpent with fangs that curled outward, and a tall, disfigured scarecrow-type creature with long, sharp fingers and unnatural bones showing out of the skin were among the pieces. The next row, a burnt orange, had small spinning tops forced in place, and some strange gears with sharp pipe-type things jutting out at odd angles. The next row was clear of pieces, and a sharp purple, and the rest was a mirror of Dib's side.

"What the hell is this?" Zim looked surprised at the question. "Don't you have chess here?" Dib blinked hard. "This is not chess. This is...I don't kow what the hell this is...this is chess!" Dib pulled a chess board off the shelf, setting it on the coffee table. Zim looked down at the board in disdain. "That is Earth's version of chess? That's a severe down grade. The 'Martians' must have taught you that." Zim made air quotes arund martian, which reminded Dib of the costume party. "Well, it's still complicated." Zim laughed sarastically, and sat down to play the Earth game. Dib wasn't sure if Zim knew how to play, but he seemed confident, so Dib didn't explain. After five turns, Dib was put into checkmate.

"What the fuck?" Dib was a very good chess player, but he didn't see the attack Zim layed out. "Complicated my green ass." Zim mumbled, and for some reason that was hilarious to Dib. "What?" "That sounds...so wrong...coming...out of...your mouth!" Dib barely managed to spit it out, from laughing so hard. Zim glared, but eventually ended up laughing as well, simply because it was contagious. "Alright...alright...now, how do you play your game?" Dib asked, ater recovering from his giggle-fit.


	25. You, Sir, Have Lost Big Time

A long time was taken by simply explaining the moves of each piece, and how the board was to be used. "Does The Dib uderstand?" Dib nodded, trying to mask his uncertainty. "Aright, then Dib goes first." Dib hesitantly moved a pipe up to the purple, and stopped in front of a spinning top on Zim's side. Apparently, either opponent can move any piece on any side of the board, and long as it does not put a 'Tallest' (a.k.a. Scarecrow thing) into checkmate if the opponent's piece is moved. If your own piece is moved, you can do normal moves and such. To Dib, moving the opponent's pieces seemed kind of pointless, due to all the regulations on it. Like, it can only move like an Earth Pawn, even if though none of the pieces in this game work like that normally.

Zim placed a serpent three spaces from Dib's gear, and smiled slightly. The game continued, and Dib appeared to be winning, but he didn't get any hopes up, since this was not his game to play. "Well, Dib-let, it would appear you are close to victory." Dib snorted. "Yeah, right. Your chess game, from your planet, that you grew up playing, and I win? Not a chance." Zim nodded, mentally applauding Dib's intelligence and lack of arogance. "Good that you realize it," Zim moved what looked like a fountain spewing fire, in front on one of Dib's serpents, and smiled with satisfaction, "because Mraaked-Baah." Dib looked up over the rim of his glasses at Zim, who sighed. "Check-mate." "Ah," Dib congratulated Zim on his unavoidable victory.

"So, that's all you Irkens do for fun? Play complicated chess on holograms?" Zim nodded, and he turned off the game and gave it back to Gir. "Wait, can Gir play?" Zim laughed, which could only be replicated by a human with a voice-deepening program and a synthesizer. "Of course! Gir, play a round of chess with Zim." The robot tossed the box on the ground, and the board lit up again. This game took much longer to finish, since Gir actually knew what he was doing. Dib saw that Zim was about to be beat by a half-wit robot dog, and the alien's brow crinkled in thought. After a very long moment passed, Zim made a final moved he seemed to almost miss, and announced his victory again. Gir pouted slightly, as best as a robot could pout, and put the game away.

"Huh. So, he can't speak your language, or do his job, but he can nearly kick your ass at chess? A bit odd, honestly." Zim shrugged, looked down at Gir, then around Dib's house. "Such an odd house. Zim did not get a good look when I was injured." He tiptoed around carefully, not touchig anything for more than a few moments. Dib watched him dance around the furniture and random lab equipment lying about, and gingerly feel everything in the room. "My house doesn't have alarms, Zim, you're allowed to touch stuff." Zim ignored him, and continued down the hallway into each room, except Gaz' room. "Where does this lead?" Dib walked up behind him. "My dad's old lab. Gaz doen't use it, out of respect. It's pretty crazy down ther-" Before finishing, Dib was dragged into the dark basement by Zim, who clearly did not think it through enough, because he almost immediately stopped in the darkness, after the door swung shut.


	26. Into The Darkness

"Why is it so dark?" Dib shrugged, but realized it was pointless. "I don't know, maybe if you turned on a light before closing the door, we'd be fine." Zim glared, also realizing he couldn't see Dib to have to proper effect. "Where's the light switch?" Dib pressed his hand against a wall, and slid his palm around until he found the switch. It didn't do much, sice the bulbs were almost burnt out, but at least they could see the steps. Zim held Dib's hand as he was led down the creaky, wooden stairs. The wood groaned under the weight, and screeched at the release of pressure. "Here we go, Membrane Lab." Dib gestured to the room. "If this place is ever used, where did you take me when i was injured?" "Oh, that's a new addition to the house. The door's near my room, on the second floor." "Oh..." Zim looked around the room in awe. The metal tables held odd tools, and chemicals in bottles. The shelfs were filled with notebooks, and lab results, and jars filled wth organs, tissue, and tumors filled all the nooks and crannies.

"Such an old place..." "Yeah, it was a lot better when Dad was alive. He kept it clean. Now, it's gotten messed up, and misused by untrained scientists who tried to find certain notes my dad wrote on experiments." Zim wasn't sure why someone would trash a lab for a few notes, but just assumed human scientists were incapable of making their own discoveries without help. Dib seemed on edge down there, so Zim brought him back upstairs. Dib just then looked at the clock. "Wow, 3AM, we should probably sleep." Zim nodded and followed Dib to his bedroom. "I see those pictures of us have found Dib's walls." Dib laughed at all the pictures of his new boyfriend he had taped up. "What can I say, the camera adores you, as does everything else."

They had originally meant to sleep, but insomnia swept the room, and they instead talked all night. Dib told Zim about the bathroom at the theater, and Zim grimaced. "How in the worlds did they come up with Greece? I have seen Greece, and Irkens have no similarities to those people." Dib smiled at the way Zim's accent played over the word 'similarities', like his planet never put those sounds together before. His voice overstressed the fourth syllable, and came out higher pitched than the rest of the sentence. "What?" Dib realized Zim was looking up at him in confusion, insecure about why his new pillow was smiling, but clearly not listening.


	27. A Romantic Tattoo

Dib mentally shook himself, and hugged Zim tighter against his chest. "Nothing, you're just cute." "Oh." Zim was not convinced that was a reasonable answer, but left it alone. No sense in questioning every aspect of human culture in such a short time. Zim realized he had been holding on to a question that presented itself at the theater, and was trying to grasp at the whispy tail of memory, so he could finally ask it. He struggled to remember, and when looking down at his hand resting in Dib's, the question reforced itself into Zim's brain, mentally rattling him.

"In that movie, why did the boy give that annoyingly loud girl that ring? Zim is confused." Dib didn't understand for a moment, but realized which loud girl he was referring too. "Oh, it's a promise ring. It was really popular back then. Not so much, now, though." Zim's antennae twitched. "Well, when people on Earth love each other, they get married. The man traditionally gives the woman a ring, to show she was taken. The engagement ring. Then, once married, she adds the wedding band. When the movie was made, teenage boys would give rings that looked like wedding bands, to show she was in a relationship. That was all that was. It shows she promises to love him, and he loves her by giving it."

"Oh...I see...odd tradition. So much metal going over fingers. Sounds ucomfortable." "They don't do anything like that on your planet? Or at least, when they did love?" Zim thought about it for a few minutes before remembering something that must have been long forgotten. "Well, when our leader wanted to prove his love for Merrzah, he gave her a marking on her palm." "A marking?" Dib wasn't sure how a mark was better than a ring, but he just went with it. "Yes, a mark. It looked like...hmm..." Zim grabbed a piece of paper and a pencil and sketched out a strange symbol. The middle was an Irken word, no doubt, and it sat on an open Lily flower. Surrounding the flower was a thick, light circle with more Irken words wrapping around the Lily. Around that circle was a thinner, darker circle with spikes pointing away from the center, and small dots in between each point.

"He put this on her palm, and one on his palm, so when they held hands, the symbols touched. That became the 'promise ring' of Irk. It stopped a very long time ago, though. I oly know about it because I always spent time at the library, as Earth would call it." Dib looked at the strange symbol. "Well, that's an odd tradition." Zim nodded. "It looks much better when drawn with Irken skin-ink." "What does the ink have to do with anything?" Zim looked up, pleased Dib had asked. He reached to the end of the bed, and Gir handed him a pen filled with bright purple ink that glowed by itself. "I'll show you," Zim grabbed Dib's pale hand and started drawing the symbol on it. When finished, he sat back, pleased with the work. "There, see? It glows, and shifts around slightly."

****It was true. Dib's palm glowed with a bright purple light, and the two circle turned in opposite directions, while the Lily seemed indesicive on which circle to follow. The Irken words shimmered in the dark, and Dib was truly amazed. "What do the words say?" Zim pointed to each word individually, reading them as he went. He started around the thick circle. "To love and hold as long as these suns still rise, and our hearts still beat." He repeated it in his native tongue, which sounded much more romantic. "Zeelfaag baach Merrzah zi jeek dezz freiidna salph baut qui, gakkdna kie bekk kwi bezz dnaa kka." Zim spoke the words softly, the way they were meant to be spoken. His purple tongue danced flirtatiously behind his sharp teeth, and his warm breath heated Dib's cheeks, sending shivers down his spine.


	28. Filler Chapter (Hot and Sweet Time)

Without thinking, or caring, he pressed his lips against Zim's, and held his body against his own. Zim put his arms around Dib's neck, and an inter-species-angsty-sexy-gay-teenage-make-out session began. Gir rolled onto the floor, not knowing what to do with himself, and left to the kitchen. The two boys kissed for was seemed to be an eternity, rolling on the bed, fighting over who gets to be on top, and which boy could get the other's shirt off the fastest. They only took off their shirts, but it was enough to give both boys a massive hard-on. If Zim's body even did that. Dib was more concerned with running his hands over Zim's jade chest. Both boys kissed feverishly, starving for the others attention and warmth. Eventually, Zim won, and was laying on top of Dib, who wasn't about to argue. After all, it was easier to hold Zim against his chest this way.

After the feverish make-out died down to soft kisses only lovers could share, Zim pulled back to look into Dib's eyes. "This is actually forbidden on my planet. We are not allowed to waste time with lovers." Zim said it in a flirting way, and smiled slightly. "On my planet, you just get called a fag. But, I'm still allowed to do what I please behind closed doors. And the occasional open one." Zim laughed, and scootched down to lay his head on Dib's chest. Dib realized somewhere in the kisses and tumbling, Zim had taken off his wig and contacts. That was either a fast process, or I was too busy staring at his waist. Either was a likely scenario, but it was probably the latter. Dib looked at his hand. "The ink smudged." "What?" Zim turned to look. "Weird. The Dib's skin is not as adhesive as mine." Zim looked disappointed at the bright purple smudge mark.

Suddenly, his face lit up with excitement. A small microphone came out of Zim's PAK on the nightstand (Dib had been certain it was embedded in his skin), and Zim called Gir upstairs. "Gir, add something to this ink to make it stick to Dib's skin, please. But make sure it's not harmful to mine." A metal hand came out of Gir's chest, and the pen was sucked in. Some gears could be heard working in his gut, and after a few moments the pen was returned to Zim's still outreached hand. "Thank you, Gir." Gir saluted and collapsed, apparently entering sleep mode. Zim redrew the mark on Dib's hand, after cleaning the old one off, and drew one onto his own.

****"There. Now you're my Merrzah." Dib laughed. "I love you, too." And with that, the two fell asleep, their new 'tattoos' glowing softly in the dark.


	29. Protective Nature

**Author's Note: Hey everybody! This story has gone on for a very long time O.o I did not expect this to be such a popular story! I just keep writing, but everyone seems to love it so far! It's flattering, to say the least '^w^ Thanks for all the support, and hopefully you'll stick around till the end. I have NO idea how I'm going to end it, though. Mostly because I don't plan anything that goes into this story XD Anyway! Back to the story!**

Dib's alarm went off at seven, to Zim's disdain. "_Mee Kaah dazz zi DAAKK_!" He shoved Dib's clock off the nightstand, and it crashed to the floor, leaving silence to fill the room. "Zim, that wasn't very nice. You owe me a new clock." Zim mumbled something in Irken as he crawled out of bed. His anntenae drooped down, as did his ruby eyes.

"Do you want to borrow one of my shirts?" Zim looked at him in tired confusion. "Why would Zim need a new shirt? This one is not damaged." "Isn't it dirty? From sweat?" Twitch twitch. "What is sweat?" Dib explained, and Zim decided sweat was disgusting. "My body does not sweat," the word seemed to taste awful in his mouth, "Irkens do not expulge moisture, or take it in. We do not need it." Dib looked at Zim's shirt. It looked brand new, and smelled that way. "Huh. Cool."

The two walked to Skool, Zim insisting on holding Dib's marked hand, and entered class. Dib realized everyone was staring at them as they sat down, fingers still laced together. The guys were laughing, which wasn't new, but the girls were what caught Dib's attention. They were whispering gossip, and glared at Dib. Apparently, Zim was popular with the girls. Not that he noticed, but it was funny to Dib.

One girl walked up, with two preppy friends in tow, and turned on full bitch-mode. "Didn't you guys, like, hate each other in Skool?" Zim, without any hesitation, replied "Yes, but now we hate all of you very much, and the enemy of my enemy is my friend. Or, boyfriend, depending on how much hate is involved." The three were dumbstruck, and walked away in a huff. A jock walked up next, his buff friends behind him, and took their turn to insult the two. "What's with you two little fags? You guys too much a pussy to try some?" They all laughed, but Zim was not fazed. "Well, if I were interested in such a thing, then at least I know your girlfriends are up for it, anytime." He turned to look at three cheerleaders, smiled wickedly, and waved. The girls bursted into blushing giggles, seriously pissing the three boys off.

"You son of a-" The main jock slammed his hands down on the desk, trying to intimidate Zim. Nobody cared about Dib at this point, but he didn't blame them. Zim leaned forward, resting his chin on his slender hands. "Do something. I dare you." His accent was thick, rich, and menacing, ad his eyes shot poison-tipped daggers at the boy, who stood frozen in shock. "I could kill you in less than 30 seconds. Glaff da maa ki zekk!" Zim started speaking his native tongue, but the message came across better that way. His snake tongue slid around in his mouth, threatening to strike at any sudden movements. The jock backed up slowly, and went to take his seat.


	30. Lunch With Sarah The Stalker

Dib leaned in close to Zim, and whispered, "That made you, like, ten times hotter." Zim smiled, his features changing from a vicious, green-skinned viper, to the cute, confused alien Dib recently decided he adored. Oh, how times have changed. Eye contact was not made with the two boys for the rest of the day. That was alright with Dib, though. Zim seemed unfazed, and decided to focus his energy on the school food. Or, in Zim's words, the 'poisonous fruits of the faculties horrid labors'. "The...what? I would suggest English, but for once you're using it correctly." Twitch.

"Okay. Why don't we just go out for lunch?" Twitch. "Why haven't we done that before?" Zim questioned. Dib shrugged. "I don't know. Never thought of it before, really." With that, the couple went back to the pancake house for a lunch break. That same waitress was serving them, and, for some reason, she was trying again with Zim. She could not take no for an answer. "Your accent is...invigorating. I love it." Apparently, her name was Sarah, she went to college uptown, and she loved absolutely everything that had to do with Zim. "Yes, well I'm sure you can understad Zim when I say go refill this drink for The Dib." Sarah loved his use of third person, but just sat there (literally) staring at Zim. After a death glare from her 'true love', she obliged.

"Get this crazy earthling away from Zim!" Zim pleaded, making Dib erupted into laughter, trying very hard to swallow it down. "Dib! Help!" Dib shook his head at Zim, and looked towards Sarah the Stalker. When the two made eye contact, he leaned in and planted a loving kiss on his boyfriend. Zim didn't really catch on to why this was happening, but he kissed back nonetheless. A small make-out occured, and Dib leaned back in satisfaction. When he looked back at Sarah, she was fuming, and gave Dib the wrong drink as revenge.

After she finished trying to get Zim's attention again, she left to go get their food. Zim peered over at Dib. "Why was Sarah so angry?" Dib blinked at him. "She was jealous 'cause I kissed you. Duh." Twitch. Dib thought it was funny that Zim's eye twitched when he wore his disguise. "What's jealous?" Zim played with the word in his mouth, not entirely sure how he was supposed to pronounce it; his tongue lingering on the l a moment. Dib was reminded of the species gap. "Um, its when someone has what you want, and it upsets you. A lot. You kind of go crazy, if you want it that badly." Twitch. "Weird. Zim does not understand what you are saying, but based on the reaction of my Stalker, I can estimate the feelings."


	31. Depressive Rain

When the two were finished with their lunch, Dib left a tip on the table for Sarah the Stalker. He figured she at least deserved that. On their way back to Skool, it started to drizzle. Dib didn't notice it until Zim started freaking out, and steam began rolling off his skin. "Gah! Curse your Earth rain!" Dib shoved Zim into a clothing store before he got soaked. Zim was glaring at Dib as water boiled into smoke on his body, making him look like green dry ice or something. "What? I can't control the weather!" Zim crossed his long arms. "Well, how is Zim going to go outside?" Dib pondered this, looking around the store. "Oh, I know. I'll buy you a jacket with a hood. But it will have to be leather, so it doesnt soak through. Come on." Dib dragged Zim towards the jackets, making him put a few on. It took a while, but they finally found one with a soak-proof hood.

"Why isn't everything soak-proof?" Dib sighed. "Because, you are the only person on this entire damn planet who is allergic to the rain." Zim glared again, but dropped the subject. Dib payed for the jacket and the two walked back to Skool. Zim was nervous the whole way, as the rain barely missed his sensitive skin. He had his hands deep in the pockets, and was hunched over slightly, to protect his face. Once safely inside the building, though, Zim stretched out his body, returning to his full height. Dib grabbed his hand before continuing to class.

Throughout the rest of the day, Zim was constantly looking out the window, watching as the rain softly beat against the glass. To Dib, it was a calming sound, but to Zim, the noise was ominous, and frightening. He would never admit that, though. Zim is Irken, and Irkens fear nothing. A small voice came from the back of the aliens mind, whispering, you're not an Irken anymore, Zekkdaa.

Dib noticed a shiver run down Zim's spine. "Are you okay?" He whispered. Zim nodded, not looking away from the window. Dib stopped listening to the teacher after awhile, and Zim never took his eyes off the rain, so Dib started to doodle on his paper. Somewhere between Paranormal Investigating, and being isolated, Dib learned to draw. He used to only draw the creatures he saw, like Big Foot in his garage. Up until today, he had stopped drawing altogether, but something inspired him. Without thinking, he let his hand do as it pleased, watching as lines became shapes, and a story unfolded before his eyes.

When his hand finally went limp, Dib looked at the drawing. It was Zim, standing in the rain with an umbrella over his head. The umbrella was held up by an arm that went off the page, as this drawing was from Dib's perspective. He looked over at Zim, who was still fixated on the weather, and folded up the paper neatly. He copied the symbol on his hand to the back, and slipped it into Zim's coat pocket. Sometime after entering Hi-Skool, Dib learned to pick-pocket. Not a very flauntable skill, but it had its uses.


	32. Inner Illness and Bad Ideas

Zim did not find the drawing until he was in bed, alone, after sending Dib home for the night. Zim said he wasn't feeling well, but Dib knew he just had a rough day. Zim layed in bed, staring at the drawing for what seemed like hours. Something in his chest was fluttering around; something he did not understand at all. For a while, he thought he was sick, but the computer assured Zim that he was healthy. "Well then what is wrong with me?!" Zim fell back onto his bed, staring up at the cieling. "Computer, send screen onto cieling." Zim's laptop's screen appeared in front of his eyes, and he controlled it through the mind link with his PAK. Zim flipped through files, feeling frustrated.

"Nothing here is helping this illness." Zim had hoped he could distract himself, but that seemed impossible at this point. Beeps came from everywhere, and some music started playing. "What is this?" A screen popped up on the cieling. Flightless Bird, American Mouth by Iron & Wine. "What is this? Zim doesn't understand." The computer didn't answer, so Zim simply listened. "I was a quick, wet, boy, diving too deep for coins..." Zim's anntenae started twitching. "...Have I found you, flightless bird?..." The fluttering in Zim's chest subsided, and he fell asleep to the soft voice of the singer.

After Skool the next day, Dib took Zim back to their theater, and they watched another old movie. This one was a vampire who fell in love with a girl, and wanted to make her immortal. "Why does he find her attractive? Zim thought humans had different tastes in women." Dib laughed. "They do, but he isn't human. Not anymore. He's immortal." Twitch. "That means he can't die, Zim." Zim gave a skeptical glance. "He can die, though. With wood. Stupid weakness, honestly." Dib gave him a sideways look. "Shut up. Earth water is harmful and acidic to Zim! Stabbing someone with a wooden spike does not prove anything. You would die from it, too. And you are not a vem-pire"

Zim's accent decided it did not like the word 'vampire', making Dib laugh. "I guess that's true, honestly," Dib agreed, shrugging, "But if you decided to spread the word that monsters exist that you can't kill, it would cause a panic." Zim looked at Dib like he was an idiot. "Mun-ster? Please. This vem-pire is the same as a...what is it called...peh-do-feel?" It took Dib a moment to understand what Zim was trying to say. His accent was particularly thick today, and whatever he said was not in his vocabulary. "Oh, pedofile!" Dib erupted into laughter, pissing Zim off. "Yeah, he is. Total creeper. But, that's the point. This one isn't a horror movie, if you can call the old ones that." Twitch. "Zim wants to watch a 'real' horror movie."


	33. Never Again

Zim later realized that this was a mistake. Dib had taken him and Gir to his house, and they watched a serial killer movie on his huge TV. With surround sound. In the dark. Half way through the movie, Zim was curled up in a ball, his antennae trembling with fear. The man in the movie was luring people into dark places, and torturing them with a cruel game of hide and seek. This poor guy had to watch his girlfriend get cut open, and gutted.

"Oh god, Carol! NO!" Zim jumped as the girl's ribs snapped. The alien boy dove behind Dib, who was glad it wasn't a 3D film. Zim was shaking all over, and Dib wrapped his arms around him. "Don't worry, it's just a movie." A small, slightly deeper than normal squeek came from Zim, and Dib squeezed him tight. "Come on, let's go to bed." Smiling slightly, Dib turned off the movie, and led Zim to his room. Zim was still shaking long after they had gone to bed, and woke Dib up with his screaming.

"Zim! Wake up! You're having a nightmare!" Zim woke with a start, sitting up straight and heaving his breaths. He was mumbling something in Irken, but Dib only heard fast-spoken nonsense. "It's okay, Zi-" Suddenly, two metal arms shot out from Zim's PAK (He was back to wearing it at all times) and lifted him up to the corner of the cieling. The green boy's ruby eyes shone in the dark, and his raspy breathing filled up the silent room. "Zim, it's okay. It's just me. It's Dib." The red stones in the corner settled on Dib, who was genuinely freaking out about Zim's lack of response.

"Maakdna?" Dib nodded up at him, but Zim still seemed lost, and frightened. "Gir!" Dib hoped the robot could help. Gir had been sleeping at the end of the bed, but now jumped up to see his master in disarray. Before Dib could speak again, Gir was scaling the wall to Zim, and a speaker popped out of his chest. Some soft music started playing, but it was drowned out by Zim's harsh breathing. The ruby eyes fell onto Gir's LED blue ones, and Zim seemed to calm down. A few hard blinks gave the alien his sense again, and the metal arms lowered him down.

Zim shrugged, sheepishly. "Sorry...Zim doesn't know what came over me." He crawled back into bed, and clung to Dib for protection. "Do you want to talk about what the fuck just happened? 'Cause my boyfriend just went ape-shit and nearly gave us both a heart-attack." Zim shook his head, a bit flustered. "Irkens don't have heart-attacks. Our bodies have back-up systems to keep everything in check. We don't rely on a few major body parts to survive." "You know what I mean, Zim." Ruby eyes looked up at Dib, like a small child that was abandoned and lonely. Dib sighed. "No more horror movies, okay?" Zim nodded, glad for the understanding.

After that crazy night, any horror movie that wasn't ridiculously stupid was banned from Zim. Which meant black-and-white movies, and anything with a screaming blonde girl in the woods was all the timid alien could handle. And anything with aliens, no matter the year. Because, apparently, human's attempt at aliens is something to laugh about.


	34. Irken Music, And Pia No

"Gir! Play some Irken music!" Before Zim could respond, Speakers came out and strange music started playing. Dib could imagine the instruments being played. It started out with a metallic pinging, like wires were being plucked, and hitting a hollow metal box or something. Dib figured the different sounds came from the thickness of the wires. The pings of the wires filled the room, and before long a deep whistling followed.

The entire room was filled with a vibrating music that shook Dib to his core. The whistling was mixed with drumming and some kind of piano type instrument. Dib was most drawn to the whistles, though. It was deep and loud, spiraling around them in an eerie fashion, and Dib realized that Zim was still, eyes shut tight. His antennas were twitching with the beat of the music, and his breathing was deep, and even.

Dib walked over to him. "Do Irkens dance?" Zim's deep red eyes opened, staring at Dib with a calm gaze. "Yes, we do." Dib smiled at how odd Zim was reacting to his own music. Gir turned it off after being glared at by Zim. "Can you whistle like that?" Zim glared. "Yes, actually. I can. And Zim can play the Mekkzaa." Dib blinked. "What the fuck is a meck zah?" A smile broke up the intense calm across Zim's face. "The Dib's accent is funny."

Zim led him to a room down the hall, and pulled out something from a closet. "This is a Mekkzaa. It's a common Irken instrument." The 'instrument' was a cylinder made out of redish metal, with wires running down it. Each had a different color, and was a different thickness. Zim sat cross-legged on the floor, Dib sittig across from him, and the green boy started to pluck the wires. The pings intertwines with themselves, forming a mesmerizing tune.

Zim smiled at Dib's hypnotic stare. "Come here. Zim will teach Dib-let." Dib scooched over, and Zim tried to teach him how to play. Ufortunately, like with everything else that dealt with Irkens, Dib was a hopeless failure. Zim laughed at Dib's frustrated attempts. "How the hell do you play this damn thing?" Dib realized that Zim's thin, slender fingers made the difference. "It's alright, Dib-let, Zim cannot play the pia-no." Zim said piano like it was two words entirely. Dib laughed. "I can. Apparently it was what young boys should do with their summers, when they aren't doing science."

Zim seemed excited. "Play the pia-no for Zim!" Dib smiled, and looked around. "Do you have a piano?" Zim looked around too, like he might have left it laying around, or something. Suddenly, Zim seemed to remember, and dragged Dib by the hand to the living room. "Computer! To the pia-no!"

The floor gave away and they were lowered to a dark room with computer screens and tables filled with equipment unknown to Dib. In the middle of the room stood a grand piano. It was black and sleek, and did not fit in with the rest of the room. Or the rest of the house, honestly. Dib had to ask. "Why do you have this?" Zim looked at the floor shyly. "Well, Zim likes the pia-no...but I cannot play it." Dib laughed, and sat downn on the little bench.


	35. Many Kinds of Sweet

**Author's Note: Hey everyone! Sorry I haven't been posting, I've been really depressed, so I'm taking out my frustrations by writing from JTHM's perspective in another story I probably won't post. It's not cute or anything XD kinda sick and twisted. I didn't want to turn this story into a depression-fest (Which starts happening in chapter 36) so I stopped for a while. I think I might start up again, so here you go!**

Zim watched in anticipation while Dib thought of what to play. The green boy bounced on his toes, clearly unable to hide his excitement. Dib finally decided to play a gothic song he heard in a bar once. It was complicated, and dark, which was perfect to show off his piano skills to Zim. Dib could tell that his boyfriend was amazed. He watched Dib's pale fingers move across the keys in a meticulous manner that seemed impossible for the alien.

The gothic boy, for a few moments, was away from the world. He wasn't an outcast, or a freak. He was a pianist, expressing his affection for the boy next to him through the music. He was remembering how much he loved the piano, and realizing how much Zim loved the melody that was filling his world. Dib played a few songs before sitting back in satisfaction. When he looked up, Zim was smiling giddily.

"Zim is happy. The Dib plays well." Zim leaned down and kissed Dib's cheek. Dib laughed. "That was adorable." Twitch. "What does a-door-able mean?" Dib laughed harder. "It means you're cute." "Oh. Okay."

Every couple of days, Zim insisted of Dib playing the piano for him. Something about the piano was mesmerizing to him. Dib didn't mind playing it for him, though. He figured it was good practice. Not that he would need it anytime soon, but if it made Zim happy, it was just as well. Apparently, Dib could play anything at all, even if it was just something he made up on the spot. It didn't matter to Zim. He loved it nonetheless. In fact, Dib's songs were better in the boy's eyes.

On that Saturday, Dib got up early to surprise Zim. He got dressed, put on his trenchcoat and combat boots, and left the house. He decided to walk down through town before heading to Zim's place. Dib noticed a bakery on a corner, and went in for some sweets. "Hi there, cutie. What can I get for you?" A dark-haired girl with a nose piercing and tattoos smiled dangerously at Dib from behind the counter. "Hmm. I'm in the need of your tastiest sweets. Any suggestions?"

The girl looked at the desserts in the glass cases, picking out all the best ones. "Let's see. We have german chocolate cakes, and these amazing little cookies that look like tea bags. They're delicious!" Clearly, she was flirting, but Dib didn't encourage her. In the end, he had cookies, a few brownies, four kinds of cake, a half dozen donuts, and two chocolate lattes with whipped cream and chocolate syrup.

"That'll be $33.40. Whoever's sharing these snacks with you is one lucky lady." Dib laughed as he paid for the food. "Yeah, I suppose you're right. We make an odd couple, honestly." She smiled, clearly not caring that Dib was taken. "Well, have a good day, sugar." Dib put the reciept in his bag without realizing the number scrawled on the back. Excited, he walked to Zim's house, knowing that his boyfriend would love the surprise breakfast.

Dib strolled up the little walkway to Zim's house, trying to be quiet so as not to trip the sensors in the ground. Dib figured Zim would still be asleep, so he opened the door slowly, whispering to the computer to shut up, so he can surprise Zim. The computer stayed quiet, thankfully. As Dib walked down the hallway, he could hear strange whistling. It was deep and carried across the house. He found out it was coming from Zim, who was down stairs (the computer thankfully formed those for Dib).

Dib found his boyfriend down in the room with the piano, trying to clean up. The computer screens were dusty, and the tables were cluttered with metal scraps and broken contraptions. Dib stood there in the dark corner for a few moments, listening to Zim's whistling. Finally, Zim smelled the food and coffee, and looked around in confusion. "You know, for someone who claimed to be the more dominant race, I can sneak up on you very easily." Zim nearly jumped ten feet in the air at Dib's enterance.

"Zii bekk kei Maakdna!" Zim yelled, making Dib laugh hysterically. "Jaa ke zii mekk aaflakkda! Qui ezz bi ked Maakdna kei zekk!" Dib grinned. "I have no idea what you said, but I brought sweets! and chocolate lattes!" Zim sniffed the air, smelling the food. This was enough for forgiveness, apparently. "Oooh! Snacks! What'd you get?"

Dib presented all of his gifts, and Zim bounced on his toes like a little kid. "Oooh! Kiiidaaa! Maakdna kiidaa zekk!" Zim's voice got very high-pitched and squeaky with joy. Dib looked at Gir. "Translate?" Gir stood up. "Oooohh! Delicious! Dib is delicious, too!" Gir said it in the cutest, girliest voice he could muster, but it still wasn't as adorable as Zim. Dib laughed at Zim's compliment. "I'm delicious, huh?" Zim blushed purple, "That is NOT what Zim said!". "Oh, sure it's not!" Zim grabbed a bag. "Let's eat upstairs, Dib-let." Dib grinned. "You mean Dib-licious!" Zim stormed upstairs, ignoring Dib's teasing.

The two boys devoured the food, giving a donut and a brownie to Gir. Zim ended up with chocolate all over his jade face, which looked adorable. "Zim, you've got some smootch on your face. Like, all over." Dib pointed out, laughing as Zim's long tongue licked up the mess from his food. "Zim gives my thanks to The Dib." Zim planted a small kiss on Dib's mouth.

After a few hours, Zim seemed to get bored, and antsy. He played with the toes on his boot-things, and rocked back and forth while sitting cross-legged. Dib chuckled softly, and grabbed his coat. "Come on, we're going out today." Zim perked up, and put Gir in his costume. The odd couple strolled out of the house, Dib stuffing his pale hands in his jean pockets.


	36. Leaves, Philosophy, and A Reference

**Author's Note: The reference is with the guy in the tree that scares Dib away. You have to be familiar with the creator of IZ to get it. **

Fall was starting to turn to winter, and the leaves were falling off the trees at an alarming rate. Gir ran through the piles with excitement, giggling maniacally as they crunched under his feet. The wind picked up as Dib looked over at Zim, lifting the leaves around the green boy seductively. A rainbow of reds, oranges, and browns swirled around Zim's feet and legs, teasingly, never touching his dark clothing. Dib watched as the leaves wrapped around and around, each spinning in their own fashion, like they were trying to get his attention all at once.

The leaves suddenly remembered something important, and blew off all at once down the sidewalk, leaving the air still and silent around the two boys. Zim decided he wanted to know the secret those leaves were hiding, and ran after them. Gir didn't notice the leaves, so he had no idea what was going on, but he followed nonetheless. The two boys were lean and fit, with long legs (Zim's were long to the rest of his body, but he was still a good head shorter than Dib), so they kept up easy, even with the quick winds and crisp air.

They stopped at a very unknown part of town, about a mile and a half from their houses. Neither knew where they were going, but they kept following the leaves that seemed to be waving them on, leading to some unknown place, full of wonder. Their tour guide stopped at the base of a large bridge, and dropped to the floor, limp and lifeless, like they'd always been there.

"Where the hell are we?" Dib wondered, looking around, trying to recognize any part of this place. Zim shrugged, walking up the bridge. "Zim does not know, but the Earth wants us here, so, here we are." Dib snorted, surprised that Zim could sound like such a hippie. But, they were there, so might as well explore. "What is this place?" Dib shrugged. "Just an old bridge, I guess. I think it leads out of town. Nobody uses it, though. It's cobblestone, too, so it must be really damn old." Zim half skipped, half hopped up the bridge, liking the noise the stone made under his feet. When they got to the peak, they looked out on the town.

"This city is so busy, but very unproductive. Zim doesn't understand humans. You all have to be somewhere, and are always going places, but you never seem satisfied with life. You have no purpose. No higher goal to reach. All you seem to do is destroy your planet, stuff your faces, and read your news. It's sad. Nobody here has a meaning for living, they just don't know anything else, honestly. I wonder how humans would react if they got a purpose, though. Would you deny it all? Would you beat your head against the wall until blood drips down? Simply from fear?" Well. That was...unexpected. "Where the fuck did that come from?!" Dib blinked hard at Zim, who laughed in an off-key voice. "Zim will be honest. I stole that from an Irken 'philosopher', I suppose they're called. But he wasn't talking about Earth. Zim doesn't remember who those words were for, but they fit nicely."

Dib physically shook himself. "Okay...no more philosophical bullshit. That was way too depressing, hopeless, and macabre for me. I already have enough sick twisted thought by myself. I do not need you to add on, deal?" Zim tilted his head down, apologetic. "Zim is sorry. In my defense, it sounds much worse in my native tongue." Dib looked out on the town, trying to shake off that weird ass experience. Dib didn't know Zim knew how to string those words in such a way that would nearly cripple the goth for no apparent reason. He wasn't sure why it bothered him so much, but Zim's hand on his arm helped wash it away.

"Anyway...nobody uses this bridge anymore. Not since my dad built that huge network of subways and electric tran-buses. It's nice, though." It was a beautiful view. The cobblestone was old, so ivy and vines laced around the ledge and in between cracks in the pathway. What wasn't covered in green or purple flowers, it was just a soft, pale grey. The view was long and wide, and the towering buildings loomed over everything, cast deep shadows on the streets. Bright lights and car horns covered everything, like pesky bugs, and a sense of hopelessness and frustration seemed to fill up the spaces between concrete and asphalt.

This part of town was silent, though. Too silent. It wrapped around this area, like a blanket wraps around a child. It was as if this piece of the city was stuck in time, never moving forward; always standing as still as the leaves on the ground. The birds were in the trees, but they didn't sing. It was as if they were mourning the loss of something long forgotten, that they knew may never come back. Dib wanted to speak, to break the silence, but something got clogged in his throat. He couldn't utter a word, or turn to leave. He sensed something was hiding here, but he didn't know what it was.

Suddenly, Zim pointed down below them, to a patch of trees. "Who's that?" Dib squinted, trying to see who was down there. Whoever it was, they were very tall, very dark, and very pale. Dib didn't like the feeling that person gave off. He adjusted his glasses. "I don't know. Some bum, or something. Let's go, it's getting late." A weird vibe came from this place, and Dib didn't like it. Zim sensed his unease, and took his hand. "Okay." As they walked down the path towards home, Dib swore he could hear a faint call from behind him. It almost sounded like someone was screaming "No! It's knee!". Dib broke into a sprint, unsure why, and never went back there again. Stupid fucking leaves, he thought later that night.


End file.
